Things You May Be Getting Wrong about menstrual health
I’ve been seeing a trend lately. Of women in their late twenties and early thirties, who have either been on the pill for many years and/or who have been diagnosed with reproductive conditions such as endometriosis and PCOS and have been put on hormonal birth control to treat it, saying that since they don’t want to have kids for many years, it doesn’t feel urgent or crucial to deal with the reproductive issues they are having. I’ve also had a few clients say this to me. Thinking that since they don't want to have kids any time soon, or ever maybe, it doesn't matter if they’re having reproductive imbalances or cycle issues. That when they do get in the zone of wanting to conceive, that will be the time to address absent or difficult periods, extreme luteal phase symptoms, or more serious diagnoses and conditions. There’s a lot here. And of course while I would never tell someone what they should do with their body and reproductive system, hello the whole premise of choice, I do think this way of thinking and the fact that within a subset of people it’s widespread points to bigger issues.
Firstly, this shows me that the wiring of the messages and beliefs women inherit and internalize from family, culture, and religion-whether they are part of an organized one or not, it’s steeped in our North American sprang from puritans society as is- are very deep. That we have in some ways, many ways, possibly unconscious ways, taken on the belief that our bodies and our reproductive system’s primary function and worth, and our worth as women, is in our ability to have babies and conceive easily. Many women with fertility issues or who have trouble conceiving in a short time say they have the feeling that their body has failed them, as well as feeling like they have failed as a woman… interesting. It also echos the message most girls are given from puberty that we don’t need to be connected to our bodies. Western society at this point loves pregnant women, more so pregnant white women, and is more ok with birth since it’s within the scope of the pregnancy or so closely adjacent to it. It then pretty much goes back to the usual program about women’s bodies. We see it in the barrage of “get your body back” awfulness that women and birthing people get post-partum. It’s not that all women consciously feel or think this way. It’s that what we are told and taught and therefore internalize is so deep, we take it on in how we end up thinking and feeling about ourselves.
By operating this way and sharing in this belief, unconsciously or not, we are contributing to and perpetuating the messages that many of us fight so strongly against. I am sure if I asked these women who have shared these sentiments from the beginning of the article, and my own clients about this, they would be horrified at the implication. And. What does it mean if we don’t want to deal with a natural thing our bodies are designed to do every month unless we are pregnant or nursing or have moved into menopause? What does it mean if we ourselves believe that we don’t necessarily need that system functioning healthily if we aren’t thinking about kids? What does it mean that we are mostly ok with taking medication that eradicates a natural cycle and process because it’s a lot of work to deal with the imbalances and get things to a healthy place?
I’m not writing to say there is great urgency, or danger, or that women who fit into this picture are doing something wrong and will suffer consequences if they don’t address these things.
I am here to ask the questions. And to point out the ways that these messages are so insidious we take them on as our own and let them create further disconnect from ourselves and our bodies. I’m here to support women in healing to a place where they aren’t rejecting and fighting their body. Where they understand how to go about addressing things that are symptoms of imbalance. Including our ways of thinking about and relating to our selves.
Although a healthy balanced cycle is crucial for conception, it also has purposes far beyond having babies. The state of our period and cycle in general is a sign and indicator of our overall health. Many systems affect the menstrual cycle and many systems are effected by it. We don’t exist in a state of total isolation, no matter how isolated we can feel, find ourselves, or sometimes make ourselves. Neither do the systems of the body. It is all interwoven and connected.
the cycle connects us to the rhythms of Nature and to ourselves.
It is about creativity and ourselves as women. It is a doorway into self development, healing, and discovering what the true feminine actually is. Spoiler, it’s not an aesthetic on instagram.
Ignoring or setting something aside can give us temporary relief from something that feels daunting, overwhelming, or that we know has some stuff to work through and heal. And the longer we ignore reproductive issues, the more of them there will be to deal with when we are ready to.
This is our right and responsibility to claim, know about, and embody.
The other factor is that conception can take preparation and the more consciously that preparation is done, the better the experience can be. Deciding to start trying to get pregnant and spending longer than you expected in that process can be very stressful and emotional. Especially if or when there are unforeseen complications or issues with fertility. For either partner. Preparing the body to conceive is not just on the part of the woman or person carrying the baby. Male health, and male reproductive health is a huge factor, literally half the game. This prep of reproductive and over all health, as well as lifestyle and emotional or therapeutic factors, potentially makes the process quicker, less stressful, and means a healthier baby.
The mother's digestion becomes the baby's digestive symptom. Vaginal flora make up is the same as gut flora make up. During a vaginal birth, as the baby passes out of the vaginal opening, it is inoculated with the mother’s vaginal flora. This becomes the babies digestive flora. This and immediate skin to skin contact with both parents sets the tone for, and helps develop the baby’s immune system going forward. The Dosha- Ayurvedic constitution- of the parents at conception together create that of the baby. Balances and imbalances included.
The healthier you are, the healthier your baby is. If you are wanting to have kids someday, being as healthy as you can years before is to your advantage and your baby’s.
If you don’t want kids or don’t know if you do, being reproductively healthy, and having a balanced menstrual cycle is equally important. It’s about you living well and harmoniously in your body. It’s about existing in a grounded, connected, and vibrant way. It’s about you shaking off the projections that people, and our culture, put on women to be a certain way and keep things about our bodies and sexuality quiet. It’s about living in full health. It’s about being connected to Nature and to our own nature. It’s a good thing.